Washington:
As hurricane season weathers on in the southern part of the United States in the wake of the alleged New Orleans “natural disaster”. Senator John Q. Snarfblat claims that “Hurricanes are the biggest hoax since global warming and the death camps of Germany” he also adds, “The Liberal Media has turned a pagan, voodoo, sin fest in to a natural disaster! I mean why should the Government take tax payers money out of my pockets, to do the repairs of a three week long kegger! It’s as if I’m supposed to believe that moisture just magically rises up into the air until enormous amounts of heated air twist in the atmosphere, then the winds circling around this hot air clockwise or counterclockwise depending on which side of the equator your on! (I don’t even think there is an equator, I been to that part of the world and have never seen a big red line going right through the planet!) THEN, get this, around this 'so called' phenomenon called the Coriolis effect the winds can reach up to 200 mph!, just as long as the water is about 79 F, HA!, Horsehockey! What I want is facts not some mystic hippy drug induced mumbo jumbo, about evaporation and water temperature being a fuel source for a natural disaster. What this really is, is God punishing the people for the sins of Marti Gras and Florida’s spring break, these people get all drugged up at their little parties then proceed to trash the place then black it out. The name “Hurricane Katrina” is just a scapegoat used to cover up their actions. What these people really need is some churchin’ up and to start praying for their souls because of the lies they tell. It’s all just another leftist conspiracy set up by the extreme liberal science media hippies trying to find incompetence with the President.”
When asked about the insurance companies unwillingness to protect the poor people with less than a seven figure salary, living within 3000 miles of the ocean Sen. Snarfblat had this to say, “Let me ask you something, What about personal responsibility? What about a companies right to make profits? What about the poor stockholders sitting at their meetings, huddling over big piles of cash without someone to bring them designer spring water? What about THEM SIR? Now that’s the real tragedy. If the President were that inept there would still be thousands upon thousands of people left in a lurch from the ‘Katrina incident’, I don’t hear about it so it must not be happing”
Senator Snarfblat was later heard disproving the ‘myths’ of rising fuel costs and breast cancer while proving Santa Claus, The Easter Bunny, and The Great Flood with the age old fact checker ‘COZ I SED SO!’
