Washington DC (GP)-
(Proof against the nation of Neverland)
Friday President Bush announced that The United States will be cutting off all diplomatic ties with Neverland ending a nearly forty year relationship between him and the fictional country.
“This administration will no longer recognizes the sovereignty of this rouge government.” The President announced in an Oval Office State of the Union address. “Clearly Peter Pan has gone too far this time, and it will not only be illegal to buy peanut butter from Neverland, but pixie dust will also be not allowed in the U.S. until the embargo is lifted. It is clear to me that Peter’s political agenda is one of terrorist motives, and he has left me no choice but to take action against Neverland. I myself am shocked and saddened by the peanut butter incident as he promised me as well that I would never have to grow up.”
After many years of cordial relations between the two governments, tensions flared up when a salmonella out beak hit the United States. After a dramatic standoff last week over American policy in Iraq, the president openly denounced Neverland, refused to accept calls from it’s leaders, and returned Valentine’s cards unread.
(He just looks like a terrorist, don’t he?)
It has not stopped there, Army posts have been seen outside the famed Redwood Forest, with direct orders to 'Be on the lookout for an Army of fairies!'
(Is this what THEY had in mind?)
Dick Cheney, had also taken time off from his time off to address the levity of the situation. “You have to understand the gravity of this. Peanut Butter is not just a food it’s a symbol of the American way of life! Peter Pan has gone too far this time and he must be stopped! Next thing you know he will be imagining yellow cake!”
“He needs to realize the we will try to use diplomacy when ever possible but, we are not afraid to go to war if necessary. We also need to be taking books out of libraries and stores, and are talking with Disney about removing Peter Pan’s Image from the theme parks. For if we do not we embolden the terrorist and let THEM win.”
(Some of Cheney's favorite toys.)
In a case of complete misunderstanding Michael Jackson made an announcement to the press asking, “After all the trouble I have taken to become a white dude, why embargo my home?”
